Ramblings at 4:30am....

No...its not just a title.....

Its 4:30 in the morning and a very rare occasion where I can't sleep. Usually I sleep like a log, but this morning has been a struggle. I'm not sure whether it's general insomnia, the dull ache in my lower back, the fact that hubbie says when I SLEEP on said back I snore (lies all lies!), the myriad of stuff I have on my mind or a combination of all these things..but for whatever reason I don't see myself getting any zzz's any time soon. Thankfully it's sunday, and I dont work til 6pm tomorrow night so surely between now and then I can get some nap nap time....in the meantime I am frustrated!

In fact, come to think of it, the last few days have been generally frustrating. Now more than ever I feel like my entire life has well and truly run off into a big fat dirty ditch. True, there is stuff going on that is really exciting and good, but most of that stuff is dependant on my job situation which at present is STILL up in the air, and unless I get the Toowoomba job it will be for potentially quite some time. I have totally handed all of it over to God, and I know in my mind that what happens from here will be totally the right thing, but I have to say that despite that it's still hard when you can't make any plans! I got my t shirt for back to school sale at work the other day, and I was looking at it wondering whether I'd BE there for back to school sale! LOL I may not even be in this town much longer....a month from yesterday our temporary lease runs out on this house, and unless they renew it we're goin to have to move anyways!

Physically I feel immobile....unable to be motivated to do much at all at the moment. I know what I SHOULD be doing....Im just not excited about it. Even Christmas holds no excitement for me! In fact, this toowoomba job is the only thing I'm really excited about at the moment, and even it may not happen at all! But at least we have the original plan if plan b doesnt work out.....though I have to say I'm a bit partial to this new opportunity now! Ever feel like God is dangling something in front of your nose but wont let you have it for sure?? GRR! LOL Im sure he's not Im just being morbid.

Well.....after bumming on the internet its now 5am...and I'm no sleepier...but I better go do something constructive with all this extra time! Peace peeps!